I talked to my bestie yesterday as she’s packing her family to go to Disney, and we were joking about the reality that is vacationing with children. “It’s not a vacation, it’s a trip!” But there is so much truth in that statement. Let’s be real—‘vacationing with kids’ is often code for ‘logistical marathon with pool breaks.’

For most moms, the lead-up to vacation is a stress spiral because we’re the ones doing the heavy lifting to get everyone out the door. It’s packing lists for ourselves and our kid(s), double-checking the clothes, medicine, chargers for every device, and confirming all the travel details: flights, hotel, car rental, you name it. Held mail, pet boarding, and every last detail you don’t want to forget but probably invariably will. I know I’m not the only mom who is tired before they even hit the door to leave.

My friend said her kid asked if she was excited about their upcoming trip, and she had to summon the energy to say, “Yeah buddy!” Narrator: She was, in fact, not excited. She had just finished mowing the lawn, and was helping the kids pack. She wanted a nap more than anything in the world.

Things don’t “settle down” during the vacation either. Trying to manage your kids (and yourself!) while completely out of the regular routine, and without any of the usual supports you’d have at your own home, can be quite challenging. Bed times go out the window, no one has seen a vegetable in days, unless you count ketchup. And they are begging to do the thing AGAIN. Add in being the keeper of the itinerary and every other thing no one else is thinking about and it’s no wonder you’re exhausted.

Am I glad we are making family memories? Yes, absolutely. I’m not knocking that time together at all. But I am giving recognition to the moms out there, to say “I see you!” because I know every single detail that goes into making sure those memories go off without a hitch.